Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this never wife?

DEAR MIKE CARES: I have been in a relationship for almost two years with an incredible man who makes my heart sing. We are both in our mid-30s. I have three daughters. He has one son whom, for lack of better words, his own parents co-parent. We are at the point in our relationship where I want to marry, move in together and do the whole family thing. He often says he wants to marry me and wants that life, but "not yet." When I ask him why, he says, "I wish I knew why. I wish I could snap my fingers and make it something I want to do now." His parents are amazing, but they always come before anyone else. If he had to choose right now, it would be his parents over me or my kids. I feel like I'm in a never-ending cycle of "Is he going to?" or "When will he get there?" What should I do? We've had long and extensive conversations, but I don't feel he is actually trying to "get there." -- WANNABE WIFEY

DEAR WANNABE WIFEY: It seems pretty simple; he likes his child and his parents more than he likes you and your three kids from some other dude, there won’t be any marriage. He is not their father and never will be, so he gets sick. He has a bad case of Half-A-Man-It is, which is brought on by acute MILF Syndrome. Eventually this guys illness will progress right into Stage 1 WTFWIT (What-The-Fuck-Was-I-Thinking.)  At this point your “heart singing” man will escape back to the “co-parent’s” house where he will be treated like the king of single fatherhood, “more syrup on your pancakes dear?” “We are thinking of taking little Johnny to the Disneyworld, they have great golf courses there, you want to come with?” Even if every time he came home you greeted him at the door with a cold Martini, a wet blowjob and handed him a new Playstation 5 controller his days as your boyfriend are numbered. You need to drop this dipshit and go find some mindless loser who doesn’t mind being bossed around every minute by four females until he takes to the bottle or takes his own life. Don’t forget about life insurance! Good Luck and Keep in Touch! Dear Mike Cares is also on X, Instagram and Facebook (whatever they are.) For more honest advice, email me your stupid questions at DearMikeCares@gmail.com