DEAR MIKE CARES: I have been married three years, this is my second marriage and his first. Even though we met at a bar and I was a little tipsy, I fell for him right away. But, the man I married is not the person I fell in love with. After our wedding, he demanded that I take his last name. I am proud of my last name, and I didn't want to drop it. (If only that were the sole problem.) I am no longer allowed to go out to lunch with my friends or even to see my family unless i

DEAR MIKE CARES: I have a real problem with my cousin and her husband. I have two sons, 13 and 14, and both are on the autism spectrum. I home school, so we live on their disability. We also receive food stamps. My cousin and her husband live in the same town and stop by unannounced, but only at dinnertime after we've gotten our food stamps. I told them this has to stop. Our food stamps barely cover us for a month, honestly. They told me I was rude and they keep coming! What

DEAR MIKE CARES: I am a cleaning lady. My customers are like family to me. If I ever found drugs, cigarettes or alcohol in a minor's bedroom, I would inform the parents. Recently, however, I found used condoms and a homemade "used" sex toy. I do not know what to do. The boys are approximately 8 and 12. The older one was involved with pornography both on the cable TV and on the Internet. His parents handled it with therapy and locks on the TV and computer. Do I turn a blind ey

DEAR MIKE CARES: It seems I will never meet my "Mr. Right," I have been dating so many for so long I cannot tell the difference between a good man, a bad man or a decent man. Every person I'm attracted to is either in a relationship tells me I have a drinking problem or just doesn't like me. Should I keep looking for “Mr. Right” or just settle for the next man I run into? SUSAN IS TIRED OF DATING IN MARYLAND. DEAR SUSAN IS TIRED OF DATING IN MARYLAND: I think if you keep dri

DEAR MIKE CARES: I am a 35-year-old man in a gay relationship with my live-in boyfriend of 6 years. We live in my house and I am the breadwinner. My boyfriend “Neal” refuses to do laundry, dishes, or clean or cook, even though he barely works. Am I wrong to assume since he is usually home all day that he should start to contribute more? Should I ask him to move out if this continues? FRUSTRATED IN CHICAGO DEAR FRUSTRATED IN CHICAGO: Sounds like trouble in Homo City! I thin

DEAR MIKE CARES: I am a 28-year-old mother of one lovely child. After a long and costly divorce, now broke but happy, I find myself in love with a wonderful man -- my Prince Charming. We both fantasize about getting married in a beautiful church wedding with ushers, bridesmaids, organ music, etc., but as a divorced Catholic, can this be a reality? If so, what are the steps we must take to make it happen? If not, what are my options? Please help my dream come true. -- Cinderel

DEAR MIKE CARES: Here are my spouse's excuses for avoiding sex: I'm tired. I'm too nervous. It's hot. It's cold. I'm too full. I have a headache. I have a stomachache. The kids might hear. I have to go to work. My mind is on other things. It's too early in the morning. It's too late at night. I'll bet you think this letter is from a husband complaining about his wife. You're wrong. It's from a wife complaining about her husband. He is 50 years old, and I am 40. We are both to

DEAR MIKE CARES: I'm a 73-year-old who has lost two wives to cancer. My last wife died two years ago, so I moved back to my birthplace to be closer to family. I met a wonderful 27-year-old woman on a dating site, and I have become smitten. I can see in her eyes that she feels the same way about me. Neither of us seems to care what other people think about the age difference. I guess my question is, am I a stupid old man for thinking about taking the next step and asking her t

DEAR MIKE CARES: I am a senior in high school in a long-distance relationship. My boyfriend, "Grant," and I live two states apart and have visited each other several times. He's four years older than I am. We met three years ago, when Grant was 19 and I was 15, and became friends through Instagram. However, he had a girlfriend and we were nothing more than friends. I developed feelings, but he did not reciprocate because I was underage. Later, after he and his girlfriend brok

DEAR MIKE CARES: I am a new mom who is fortunate to be able to breastfeed. We've had several guests come to our house to meet the baby, and if she needs to nurse, I go to the couch and allow her to breastfeed. I don't feel the need to hide in another room in my own house when I'm comfortable on my couch with all my necessary pillows to assist. My sister wanted to bring her new boyfriend over to meet my husband, the baby and me. Before they came, she called to ask me to refrai

DEAR MIKE CARES: I am a woman in my late 30s. I have had a few failed relationships and a marriage that ended in divorce. At one point, I juggled three lovers at a time. I like being in a committed relationship, but I have yet to be faithful to any partner I have ever dated. In my teens, I was raped by an 18-year-old guy and molested by a man who was in his 40s. I received counseling and therapy starting in my late 20s. I love the thrill of meeting someone new and learning wh

DEAR MIKE CARES: I have a 42-year-old son, "Wade," who still lives at home, has anxiety, depression and a wild temper. He receives minimal, below-poverty-level disability payments. Wade's father and I give him money when he says he's hungry and out of food. (We are both retired.) Wade claims his lack of money is "the system's" fault. Wade also imagines he can earn a living in the music industry. I am beyond tired of this. I'm a retired teacher. How can I help our son to becom

DEAR MIKE CARES: I have been in a relationship for almost two years with an incredible man who makes my heart sing. We are both in our mid-30s. I have three daughters. He has one son whom, for lack of better words, his own parents co-parent. We are at the point in our relationship where I want to marry, move in together and do the whole family thing. He often says he wants to marry me and wants that life, but "not yet." When I ask him why, he says, "I wish I knew why. I wish

DEAR MIKE CARES: My son has a best friend, "Earl," he has hung out with since they were 14. Earl considers me his second mother because his real mother deserted him after he graduated from high school. He has never married or had kids. I'm 76, and Earl is 55. He does small jobs for me off and on, like changing the lightbulbs in my kitchen, fixing a light switch, replacing my windshield wipers, etc. He calls me off and on, and we email a lot. We both love movies and enjoy disc

DEAR MIKE CARES: I have a connection with someone very close to my heart, but I'm afraid our relationship isn't healthy. I'M the one who pays our rent. I'M the one who pays for all the food. And I'M the one who has to drive ALL THE TIME -- and, as you know, gas isn't cheap. It upsets me because he also never talks to me. I do like his style. What I love most about him is he is always there to support me. He gives the best hugs! He has beautiful eyes. And I just KNOW he loves

DEAR MIKE CARES: I am a senior woman in great shape. I am active, and I have never had a problem attracting men. Five years ago, I married a man I had known for many years. We used to have a pretty active sex life, but it has been four years since he has touched me in an intimate way. He says he doesn't know why, and that it is due to lack of confidence. I'm afraid that if I don't leave, I'll never know the loving arms of a man around me again. In other ways, we get along fin

DEAR MIKE CARES: My wife's nephew is getting divorced. The process seems to be amicable; there was no cheating or abuse. They have two children. Even though the soon-to-be-ex, "Michelle," has always been welcoming and nice, my wife's family has circled the wagons. They no longer talk to her and have made clear I can't either. I don't think that's right. My wife says to stay out of it and never contact her. I think that's immature. I realize my thoughts don't matter. However,

DEAR MIKE CARES: My 58-year-old husband recently shared a bed in our camper with a 21-year-old family friend. The friend is female. This happened in my absence. He thinks of her as a "daughter," and although I'm not concerned about anything inappropriate happening between them, I still feel it was inappropriate. I expressed my feelings to him and said I didn't want it to happen again, but it did. He still thinks it's perfectly fine, but I do not. What are your thoughts? -- IN

DEAR MIKE CARES: My husband and I (we're both male) have been together since 2007. We moved to Arizona in 2010. Most of our family lives in the Midwest. We have been visiting our families as often as possible, at least every other year. Our son-in-law refuses to let us stay the night in his home when we visit. His excuse is, he doesn't want to have to explain to his two daughters why we sleep in the same bed. (The daughters are 6 and 8.) My husband and I no longer feel comfor

DEAR MIKE CARES: I'm a young gay man with a problem. I met a cute guy, "Mark," with a sweet personality, and the sex has been awesome. We spent two consecutive nights together in a hotel, but two days later he went to church, and he's now convinced that being gay is wrong. Mark still rubs my foot with his under the table while we eat and kisses me on the lips. He tells me he loves me very much, but now I'm getting mixed signals. At night on our dating app, Mark sends nudes of