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Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this cock tucking man wife?
DEAR MIKE CARES: I am a gay male and have been with my husband for many years now, married six of them. Every time an issue comes up,...
Jan 7, 20251 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this great dad seeking sex-slave?
DEAR MIKE CARES: My husband and I will soon celebrate our 11th anniversary. Together since we were 19, we're now in our mid-30s with two...
Dec 10, 20242 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this ball-busting future divorcee?
DEAR MIKE CARES: I just turned 29. My partner, "Jeremy," and I have been together for six years and have talked about getting engaged. He...
Dec 9, 20242 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this Cunt-Chocula?
DEAR MIKE CARES: My husband and I have been married for 15 years. He made a resolution to go on a diet and cut out sweets. However, I...
Dec 2, 20241 min read
If you hear any of these at Thanksgiving your family is more dysfunctional than you think...
"The only dark meat P-Diddy will be getting this year will be from his cell mate." "Now that bitcoin hit $95k I feel a little better...
Nov 28, 20241 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this father of a bitch-boy?
DEAR MIKE CARES: My son and his wife have been married for three years and have an 8-month-old son. She stays home to care for the baby....
Nov 25, 20242 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this sad-sack-sibling?
DEAR MIKE CARES: What can I buy for Christmas for my brother who is terminally ill with cancer? Nothing seems right -- not music, books...
Nov 23, 20241 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this romance seeking half-dead geezer?
DEAR MIKE CARES: I am elderly and stuck in a miserable marriage. The romance is long gone. We live as roommates. If I were to die...
Nov 13, 20241 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this gash slinging cock worshiper?
DEAR MIKE CARES: I'm a woman in my early 20s, and I have been dating my man for two years. I love him dearly and want to spend the rest...
Nov 12, 20242 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this dateless planner?
DEAR MIKE CARES: I have been married for 17 years to a good man with many great attributes. However, our relationship lacks connection....
Nov 11, 20242 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this reluctant beaver sharer?
DEAR ABBY: I'm in an open relationship with my partner. We both enjoy hooking up with other people, but only if we agree on the person....
Nov 6, 20241 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice do you have for this chronically clueless sister?
DEAR MIKE CARES: My brother lost his wife of 30-plus years to COVID. Because we live several states apart and I have significant chronic...
Sep 30, 20241 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this cheating beaver-slinger?
DEAR MIKE CARES: A close male friend, "Will," ended our friendship without warning. I didn't know he had such strong feelings about my...
Sep 12, 20242 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this Canadian lottery winner?
DEAR MIKE CARES: For the entirety of our 15-year relationship, my wife has never listened to me. It's literally the only thing I've ever...
Sep 11, 20241 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this needling nitwit?
DEAR MIKE CARES: I've been seeing "Pete" for eight months. He has been divorced for the last 15 years. He has two grown children and...
Sep 6, 20242 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this madame ovary?
DEAR MIKE CARES: I am a 37-year-old woman with a very supportive husband. I love him dearly, but I have some concerns. We have no...
Sep 5, 20241 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this parasitic whine maker?
DEAR MIKE CARES: I recently scheduled a last-minute consultation with my doctor that might result in surgery. My husband has a meeting...
Aug 30, 20241 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this egg wielding nit-wit?
DEAR MIKE CARES: My husband and I have been married for two years, together for five. He's a wonderful man I love dearly. I always felt...
Aug 26, 20242 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this Texas Twink?
DEAR MIKE CARES: I'm a single man, and have been for 15 years. A year ago, I met a guy, "Josh," and we fell in love. He lived 240 miles...
Aug 21, 20242 min read
Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this Hen in this Fox house?
DEAR MIKE CARES: My husband of 25 years and I have become political opposites over the past several years. We watch different news...
Aug 18, 20241 min read
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