Dear Mike Cares, how would you answer this Dear Abby? *case of the used gym equipment

DEAR ABBY: I've been married to the most amazing woman for 30 years. She became a personal trainer and is in incredible shape. I'm not in her kind of shape, and I can't perform too well sexually, even with ED meds. She recently asked if she could have her (sexual) needs taken care of by a young client she trains. I'm OK with it, since I'm sympathetic to her desires, as long as she doesn't fall in love. Your thoughts? -- WANTS WHAT'S BEST FOR HER

DEAR WANTS WHAT’S BEST FOR HER: Here is a news flash for you pork-chop, your whore wife has been practicing penis Pilates for years while you sat at home on the couch slurping cheeseburgers and chips until both your wife and cock gave up on you. It’s official, you are a bloated half-whit who single-handedly has turned your wife into the "most amazing" used piece of equipment at the gym!