Dear Mike Cares, how would you answer this Dear Abby? *case of the Ass-Man

DEAR ABBY: My daughter "Lia" and her husband, "Jerry," visited his mother and stepdad, "Gil," a few months ago. Gil gave Lia an inappropriate hug, with his hand sliding to her buttocks. Lia said Gil had done this before and it made her uncomfortable. She told Jerry, and he began watching his stepdad closely when they visited.

Recently, my family and I visited Jerry's parents. Gil gave me a hug around my back, and then slid his hand down my back and grabbed my buttock with a quick squeeze! His wife was standing in front of us when he did it. I looked at her in shock. She looked down at the floor and then at me, expressionless. After I told my daughter what he had done, she told me he had done it to her as well.

My son-in-law wants to tell his mother he doesn't feel comfortable leaving his young daughters at their house. I know Lia and I should have said something when it happened, but we were caught off guard and didn't call him on it. How do you think this should be handled? -- CAUGHT OFF GUARD

DEAR CAUGHT OFF GUARD: So “Gil” is an Ass-Man, loves the Ass-Play, is that what you are concerned about? Some men like legs, some men like breasts, some men like little boys in the church basement. Gil may not consider his hugs and Ass-Grabs inappropriate since no one has called him out on it, I would suggest you let him know that running his hands all over girls’ asses as part of a friendly greeting could lead to a gasp, a slap, or if the girls are really young, a shallow-grave burial. Someone could also press charges, and while the old Gil~ster sits in jail waiting to be bailed out he might just bump into a fellow Ass-Man, but will probably experience a whole different level of inappropriate Ass-Play!

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