Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this dateless bridal to-beast?

DEAR MIKE CARES: My fiancé and I are going back and forth about setting a date for our wedding. We have begun arguing lately about normal relationship issues. He calls them fights, when all I'm trying to do is express my feelings so we get on the same page. Then, instead of talking, he shuts down and clams up. It makes me crazy.  Now he's saying he won't set a date until our relationship is "healthy." He says we fight too much; I think it's a lack of communication. Now I say nothing because I'm afraid he won't want to set a date at all. I don't know what to do. Setting a date is important to me, but I'm starting to wonder if it's even worth it. Please help. -- DESTINATION UNKNOWN IN NEW JERSEY

DEAR DESTINATION UNKNOWN IN NEW JERSEY: Your fiancé has a gift, he can see into the future and what he sees is a lifetime of you “expressing your feelings,” which will age him prematurely, and turn him into a wife-beating, porn-addicted alcoholic. You should take advantage of his gift and ask him if he can predict which one of you ends up in the back seat of a police car, or face down in a puddle of blood. Also, if setting a date is still so important to you perhaps a date with a shrink will suffice until you two can “get on the same page,” because right now he’s on the epilogue and you're on the prologue. Good Luck and Keep in Touch! Dear Mike Cares is also on X, Instagram and Facebook (whatever they are.) For more honest advice, email me your stupid questions at DearMikeCares@gmail.com