Dear Mike Cares, what advice would you give this meatloaf slurping ball-buster?

DEAR MIKE CARES: I met this man online a year and a half ago. We have been together ever since. There is a serious problem with him watching porn. When we met, I knew he was doing it when I was not with him. He knows I'm not happy about it, and he tried for a while to keep it hidden from me. More recently, he would watch it and then want to come get cozy with me. When I tell him it's a complete turnoff for me, he gets upset and tells me I need to see a therapist to get over it. I told him he should get help if he expects to have a relationship with any woman. I think he's obsessed with pornography. Am I overreacting?

I'm beginning to feel like it is more important for him to watch porn than spend time with me. I do love him and very much want to be with him, but I can't seem to get over this. Help, please. -- DEAL-BREAKER IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR DEAL BREAKER IN PENNSYLVANIA: You met a guy online who loves online porn.  You are clearly dim-witted and since you’re from Pennsylvania probably as big as a double-wide trailer. Let me spell it out for you pork-chop, he is so desperate for sex, that he has to turn on the porn and immerse his beer soaked brain in images that he prays remain crystal clear while he attempts to get “cozy” with you without losing his erection.  BTW, if Pornhub had a category for your type of gal it would be something like: “BBW who need to shut the fuck up, stop complaining, and take whatever they can get because the only men in your life will always have one foot out the door.”   Good Luck and Keep in Touch! Dear Mike Cares is also on X, Instagram and Facebook (whatever they are.) Email me your stupid questions at DearMikeCares@gmail.com